Outer Expressions of Inner Emotions

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But really, she is awesome.

Yeah, yeah, I know its irritating when people blog about their friends, who then blog back about them, and it feels like a strangely narcissistic, faked grab for attention, like, “How about I say you’re awesome, so then you feel the need to reply that I’M awesome, and we repeat this over a long period of time, so that everyone around us thinks we are just too awesome for them, that we’re this elite group of blogging SUPASTARS!”

Dooce.com has been accused of this, as has the Bloggess, and a few others, and if its true, it works, because I think they’re all awesome and I wanna be like them someday, as much as I dislike being made to feel like I’m not in the “in” group.

So fuck that, I’m starting my own insiders group. It consists of me. And Cassie. Who is awesome. And you’re not invited.

Just kidding.

Buuut, Cassie IS awesome.

We go entirely too long between seeing each other, but when we do, it’s so very worth it, and it makes me so happy to have a friend who, hell, COULD be in Dooce and the Bloggess’s in-group. And while she’s sitting around having drinks with some of my favorite bloggers would still go, “Oh hey, I’m inviting my friend Monica over to join us. You’ll love her!” despite knowing perfectly well that I will never speak, will suffer from convulsions of introversion the whole time, and most likely will sit in a corner watching everyone like some freakish creeper.

It’s rare to find people who genuinely understand and still enjoy introverts. We can be an unsettling (unsettled?) group.

I love our conversations, I love that she makes me think, I love the way she questions things. If I could have one characteristic of hers, it would be that, her spirit of questioning. Usually I’m so busy mentally chewing on whatever information I just received, or worrying about the socially appropriate response to it, that I can’t even begin to think of follow-up questions that I undoubtedly have later but am too slow to put forth at the right moment.

Anyway, I’m gonna stop there, because Cassie knows she’s awesome, I know she’s awesome and those of you who do not know her are either jealous or annoyed about not knowing her.

But I guarantee that if you send her some vegetarian meatballs right now, she’d be your friend too.